“Where Does YOUR House of Worship Fit in YOUR Home?”

In 2025, after piano and ballet lessons, soccer practice, Social Media time, Netflix, family time, friends, chores, school work, and the two of you working three jobs…where does the temple fit in? In other words, where does your house of worship fit in your home?

As a Synagogue Executive Director, I’ve seen firsthand how much of a struggle it can be in many Reform and Conservative congregations to put “butts in the seats” for regular Shabbat services…therefore, I can’t say that I’m surprised by the results of this study. Although it is still shocking to see the actual numbers, many churches are also struggling with these questions.

In this day and age, if one is not particularly observant, what does it take to garner enough interest in someone to make them desire to be regularly involved, in some shape or form, at the nearest temple? What can get you there?

Charismatic, authentic Clergy is certainly a starting point. Gotta have it. Geography is also key. Who wants to drive more than 10-15 minutes to a house of worship when there is so much else vying for your attention? Even growing up in the 80s, I know that I was not the only one in my Hebrew and Sunday school classes who would have preferred being at soccer or basketball practice with my Christian friends. We were already being over-programmed as kids back then, but we didn’t have smart phones or Social Media, Prime, Apple +, Hulu, etc., streaming every single possible thing in the world right to our own personal hand-held movie theater. All of these options right at our fingertips have quelled the desire of more secular-leaning adherents of various religions to attend worship services even more. Kids are glued to their screens, and after an exhausting day, or week at work, so many parents simply want to tune out as well. Time for Netflix seems to be a common mantra after dinner hour for many of us. The aspect of Temple as a possible “3rd place” outside of work and home began decades ago, but with the growing popularity of coffee shops and personal electronics that trend has dramatically reversed itself in many instances.

At Temple Beth El of Hollywood, we’ve been asking ourselves hard questions these past few years. Since COVID-19 really, as that period made so many of us reconsider and rethink both how we live, and how we “do business.” Questions such as, “How can we continue to offer the basics of what the older generations expect in a synagogue, while somehow trying to alter our operations, our programs, our long-range vision to adapt and be relevant to a changing world?” In a world where Zoom is a verb, and virtual programs are here to stay, why would someone get off the couch to come to a temple and worship, play, learn? The obvious answer would seem to be that most of us still seek a sense of belonging, community, caring, and continuity. But that drive to commune with one another doesn’t seem quite enough anymore to compete with all of the options and distractions available to us.

Like most Jewish houses of worship, we host Shabbat services, Sunday School, Adult Education, celebrations of major holidays, Sisterhood, Brotherhood, Social Action, and Bar/Bat Mitzvah training. We also have a wonderful, Apple-Accredited Preschool. None of this is extraordinary, rather it’s a baseline. For Bar or Bat Mitzvah, we actually have 2 different tracks. And what does this mean?

Traditional Track: Through being a member family of our congregation, and attending our Sunday School, a child is eased along the path of a modern, Jewish education that eventually evolves to include learning about what it takes to become an adult in Judaism, and training on how to get there. The benefits of this traditional model are well-documented. A sense of community and relationships that come with being part of a temple or synagogue is a major reason many of us commit to being supporting members of a “House of Worship.” However….

We’ve been hearing for years that there is a significant portion among the less observant who long for their children to have the Bar/Bat Mitzvah experience without committing to supporting a temple community. It may be sad, but that doesn’t make it untrue. Therefore, we created our “APP Program.”

In this transactional, fast-food, ADHD, multi-personal-device, person-driven society, many Jewish and interfaith families are disinterested in being a part of a “fixed Religious community.” And yet, they STILL want to provide that one rite of passage that is definitively Jewish for our kids. A Bar/Bat Mitzvah. For families that fit this mold, this program exists.

Without any of the commitments that come with joining a congregation, a family can have their son or daughter go through training (on average 9-12 months) with our well-loved and talented Cantor, Manny Silver, who does a wonderful job of “meeting kids where they are” in his mentorship. Truly personalized paths of learning that towards the end of the process are also joined in on by our Rabbi, Aaron Sataloff, so that he can get to know each student and add to their experience before it’s time to stand on the Bimah together. Over the years, many students and their families have benefited from this program, and we feel it’s a necessary component of ensuring the survival of our peoplehood. While it may sound counter-intuitive since those who take advantage of this path are basically unengaged at the temple most of the year, we are still assisting in the continuation of Jewish knowledge and identity…and pride. And even though this may NOT ensure the survival of all temples and synagogues in a new world, it CAN help Judaism survive, thrive, and evolve. We cannot be so enamored of the four walls we inhabit that we disregard the potential to keep a flame of Jewishness lit out in the world. By any means necessary and at our disposal. And to that end, we’ve also created a festive “Alternative Shabbat Experience,” which we call 2nd Saturdays/Shabbatstock.

As the name suggests, on the 2nd Saturday of each month October through May, our Worship band, JewGrass Revival, leads a folk-rock-oriented service under the big, beautiful trees on our front lawn. The goal in creating this experience was to make a once-a-month, Shabbat “mini-festival” feel that would be appealing to those who just don’t want to be with us, or can’t be with us on Friday nights. This dog-friendly environment features a coffee truck serving lattes and espressos, etc., a big lawn for the kids to run around on, and often a post-service activity such as yoga, a Ukulele Circle, or story time for the little ones. Neighbors stop by and commune in a VERY casual Shabbat experience. The Neshama in nature is 2nd to none. Outside the walls!

We even offer a boutique Yoga & Fitness Studio in our Chapel every Monday through Friday with expert practitioner Sue Elle Strong.

We love embarking on “field trips” with our congregants to baseball games with the Marlins, and basketball games with the Heat, as well as museums and member-hosted house parties where we expand beyond the four walls, out into our broader community.

If you’ve reached this point in the article and would like to know more about any of the above-mentioned items, or would like to talk regarding anything else temple-related, please reach out and say hello. We’d love to show you around and share a cup of coffee.

If you’re interested in signing someone up for our APP program, mention this article and receive a $500.00 credit towards their training!

Shalom.

Jeff Jacob

jeff@tbehollywood.com